Monday, March 7, 2011
I Danced with God Today ...
Today was like any other day for me, normal, with nothing exciting lurking in the shadows. I woke up with this immense sadness on my chest. I discussed this prior that perhaps being sad has become habitual to the point that I just am that way without intentionally meaning to be, it just is so.
Anyway, I went to yoga (amazing, but for another blog) and I followed by having a great time in the step class (a really good friend joined me, will be in another blog). Interestingly enough, while I was in a relaxation pose towards the end of yoga, I closed my eyes and tried to become one with myself. I tried to get into my own head and answer the question of why I have allowed something so pessimistic and foreign to is shape, change, and alter a new me, without intentionally meaning to.
I closed my eyes, and as I laid on the floor, trying to find the rhythm of my heart and the sound of my inner voice, God asked me to dance. A gentle hand reached for mine and we began, just like that. It may sound silly or funny or ridiculous even, but he did. As a dancer who has yet practiced her art in quite sometime, I didn't miss a beat in my dream really; if I did, it didn't matter. God twirled me around and made me smile, he lifted me up in the air, and we moved as one unit. As I tripped or stumbled, he caught my arm or leg and twisted me away from my misshap, and we kept the dancing going. I moved and became the best dancer I had every been in this moment, and I was so happy. I danced with God. It was beautiful. I thought about the energy that I was putting off in the world, recognizing we all are apart of our circumstances. I realized that I was missing the bigger picture, and I realized that I wanted to use my energy and my life to change the world, my world. As I sat up, keeping my eyes closed, the instructor stated something along the lines that we are a constant energy that should be used for good. Her words resonnated with my dance, my dance with God. I smiled and kept smilling.
When I left the class and I went to buy my lunch, I looked on the wall and saw something amazing. I saw a statement that said this: If you want to predict the future, start by creating your life.
I realized then that through coincidences, I was having an ongoing conversation with God. It was as though he was whispering in my ear as we danced our sweet, amazing dance. We hold the change that our heart craves and desires. I realized that I will have to commit every day to a better me, and that saying I will today, doesn't necessarily flow into tomorrow. It's like forgiving, where you have to make a conscious effort to forgive every day. I will make that effort, and yes, I got this all from one dance. I danced with God today, and I realized he was something else to me, my ballroom dance partner. Together we will become champions, in this life and perhaps the next.
What a beautiful dance it was.