De-Clutter and Re-create your Life

Since this is a confessional blog, I am going to start every blog off (unless it is a piece of writing) with a confession.

Confession: I have a nasty habit of interrupting people when I am passionate about an issue or subject we are discussing. Not to make an excuse, it has nothing to do with whether or not I disagree or agree with them, but instead, it comes from the multiple fleeting thoughts that I do not want to forget, begging for a chance to be released through my words. So, I just spew them, and sometimes, with little regard of my conversational partner. If I have done this to you, maybe you understand me a little more now, and I offer a true heartfelt apology.

So, now that I have identified a personal issue that happens to be interrupting other people, I began to wonder does it interfere with me personally, in any other way. Of course it does, how could it not? Often, more times than not, we interrupt ourselves without even noticing; even if you have not developed a habit like mine. Does that mean we do not value our own voice, or is it something bigger? Have we been told to cool it, or quite down one too many times? Have we been shunned or ridiculed for opining? How many times have we allowed ourselves to not finish a complete thought, but instead, we jump to another subject. Perhaps, the notion you were thinking about was a bit too heavy at the time, maybe you didn’t have the answers, or maybe you weren’t asking the right questions; which leads me to my next point.

In order to stop cluttering our lives, we have to stop interrupting ourselves and really listen. Remove the useless antics, stop with the self-loathing that leads to self mutilating forms; rather it is a physical lashing (cutting, hitting, or even overeating) to a mental lashing (strong diffidence: wallowing in low self esteem, denying ourselves praises, or believing the negative from different sources including ourselves).

My interrupting habit has manifested itself into a form of interrupting myself. I wonder how many times have I tried to listen to God and I have interrupted even him. When you block yourself or allow occludes to be ever present in your life, hoping to defend yourself from multiple offenses, we often are closing ourselves off from other good things, positive results. Enigmatic thought, isn’t it? To be honest, it doesn’t have to be though. It all starts with the first step, recognition.

In order to de-clutter your life, you, me, all of us, need to stop interrupting ourselves and listen to the complete thoughts and reasons that come along with these momentous and profound heady-thought events. Take some time out to pamper yourself, and I suggest this because it allows you to connect with yourself. You began to realize what you like, what you don’t like. For example, get a manicure so you can start to begin to love the way your hands look, feel, and move. In those moments of pampering, you can relax and breathe, while listening to the inner you that has tons of things to say. Stop to watch your body, your expressions, and your laugh sometimes.

To upshot, yes, I’m wrapping it up, I just want to point out one more thing. In order to get over the bad things in life, we have to be able to listen to ourselves, and remove the baggage. Unpack your bag, you’re staying for more than one night, it’s okay because you are welcome. If you need to go inside of your closet and throw the old dresses, pants, or shirt (metaphorically speaking) do that as well, make room for a more refined you. Your mind, your body, your soul, and your spirit are all welcomed by you; at the very least they should be. If you do not invite yourself in, who else would not be hesitant to let you in; surely you can trust yourself, or do you not? Perhaps that is a question you should ask yourself. Let us all ask the right questions and not offer empty answers, because too often we do that as well. In the midst of bad moments, we all can find it hard to remember a good memory; it is sad that good memories are so fleeting. However, they do not have to be. Stop, look, and listen to yourself and that is when you can start the de-cluttering process of your life. I am not huge on selfishness, I believe in altruism; however, it is okay to take time out for YOU and not feel GUILTY ABOUT IT. So, I guess I am trying to say, it is not being selfish if you are being self serving, because the self serving is a stepping stone for you to start serving others. Think of how mentally freeing this world would be and at ease if we followed these simple steps.

Ask yourself, how you are doing and mean it. When you give an answer listen NOT just because the answer is important, but because your voice is important as well. This is not only a right, but a responsibility for all of us. Even if you have to complain to yourself, let it out; nevertheless, in the midst, find the source of this energy and stop it before it consumes who you are. Control your attributes and characteristics. Recreate your future by redesigning your today, and following through tomorrow. Make the commitment, every second, every minute, and every hour to be a better you. Simply, de-clutter.



Hi, I'm Trinity, and it's really nice to finally meet me. Clarity at its best, leads us to beauty moments like these:

Wedding Wednesday: Matching Making at its Finest

So, I was thinking that there are celebrities out there that just don't know how to date these days. I think their faith should be left up to someone else other than themselves. If you are wondering what my credentials are for setting people up, well you can just ask a few of my friends that happened to have gotten married after I introduced them or at least had a great relationship for the most part. I can just introduce you and suggest that you will be good together, and it is up to you to make it work (I take no responsibility with nasty split-ups, just the set up portions). But nonetheless, I really do have a great eye for these things. This week on Wedding Wednesday (first post of its kind), I would like to discuss the famous solo bachelors and bachelorettes, starting with, of course, sexy Jennifer Anniston and the studdly George Clooney.

So, George says he will probably never remarry, and Jennifer is in no rush. Nevertheless, I feel that these two nomadic souls have what it takes to become as one. Yes, I said become as one. To speak candidly, when I was younger, perhaps it was in People's Magazine that put out the sexiest people alive awards, I knew then that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie would make an amazing couple. I know you are probably gasping, clinging to your Team Jen side or whatever, but let's be honest, we don't know the make up of their relationships; we just don't. Another honest statement is, I also never cared for the look of Jennifer Anniston and Brad Pitt, though I have always loved both of them, separately. I know my opinion doesn't matter, but I'm giving it anyway. I just think that people should be with someone that compliments them well on multiple levels.

Jennifer and George believe it or not, have more in common than meets the eye. I think they should at least date, once. Who cares if George is Brad's friend, he didn't care when she dated Vince. Does anyone else think that it is strange that Jennifer dated Vince after Mr. and Mrs. Smith, while Angie and Brad began to date openly, after? Maybe Vince dished all the dirty secrets of what happened between Brad and Angie on the set. You really have to be memorizing to occupy another woman's husband without doing anything sexually or making any sexual promises (that's their claim and their sticking to it), but I guess that's just Angelina for you. You know, the psychic twins predicted that they are going to break up, and this is the one thing that I have to disagree with them on; call it my psychic powers intervining. I love Angie, but this blog isn't about her. Back to Jenny ...

The biggest misconception is that Jen Jen is unhappy, and that is self proclaimed from her. You know what, I believe her, and I never believed the multiple reports that somehow she was depressed. This woman has an amazing career, regardless what you think about her movies. She has a set of great friends, and she can date pretty much whoever she wants; so it's not like she's lacking in the sex department or anything.

George does the same thing as Jennifer. He is a free spirit, often misread and people think that he is unhappy and unlucky with love. These two people are happy individuals that can live in happy unmarital bliss as long as they both shall live, if they just give it a try. I think it would do them some good. Even though they may have some differences, perhaps the other can be the ying while the other is the yang. Who knows, but I just look at those two and think they would work, I just know it.

Who's with me on this one?

Dear Victoria, shame on you. I know your secret.

Dear Victoria Secret,

I have a confession of the heart to make, and I do apologize if I offend you as this letter proceeds. I've loved you from the moment that I saw your magazine. As a matter of fact, I always dreamed of one day being an Angel. I've had the height for quite sometime, and I've had the weight (more not than often). Nevertheless, I loved that you had the Tyras, Selitas, Heidis, Giselles, and Adriannas all walking down the runway together, letting us know that beauty comes in multiple shades. Naomi Campbell has even graced your runway before, and that dynamic just completed the shades of beauty that wore your clothes. I especially got excited when you started using Jessica White. She is of a beautiful dark skin complexion, and she shows how beautiful dark skin women can be in bathing suits, yoga clothes (as if we don't work out), and the latest shoes designed by Steve Madden.

The thing is, the other day when I went to your website to look at bathing suits, I did not see Jessica White in the bathing suit section, or really anywhere. Not that I only care about seeing her, but it helps me as a darker skinned women, visualize what colors would look good on my skin. I hate that things have to be about race in this country, I really do. I hate that I can count the number of super models on my hand that are African American, and that we are still in the "first" stages of everything. Nonetheless, this is the defect of our birth as Americans. I just loved you Victoria, because you seemed to push the idea of beauty when everyone else was at a standstill.

I will forgive you Victoria, because I do not believe your actions were intentional; I just don't believe they were meant to hurt my feelings or make me wonder about you. But I do ask you not to go backwards, but continue moving forward, scouring the land for beautiful beauties of all shades, including mine. I'm just going to make the simple request to bring Jessica White back, so that I can see someone like me, wearing your clothes, so that I know what it will look like. Contrary to popular beliefs, African Americans do like the beach, we do like to swim, and the sun is just as beautiful to us as it is to anyone else. You may not know this, but it matters to me. It matters to me that there are thousands of pictures on your site with beautiful women that don't look like me, and then I can only find two pictures of girls that look like me, just two. It makes me feel as though people my complexion are either not appreciated for their skin complexion, or we just aren't considered beautiful. I hate that I can count on my hands, and when I do count on my hands, the number comes back extremely low. Under the dress section is where I found the two models, and you know what, I own one out of the two dresses shown. I bought the dress because of how beautiful it was on Jessica's skin. Perhaps, we can move the amount up to five pictures this year, and spread it between the bra tops tab and the bathing suits? So, as someone who has spent a lot of money on your clothes and has a closet full to prove it, I just ask you to put Jessica White in a few swim suits so I can see what it will look like on me. Or maybe, if you want a change, you can use me, no complaints or objections here. I still have the dream of being an Angel.

Here is the dress that I bought, which Jessica is modeling below:

Here is a picture of me in case you are wondering what I look like Victoria. As a matter of fact, here are a few pictures of me Victoria at different times, but they have one thing in common, I am wearing your clothes. One dress, the white one, I have in both colors (the purple and white version), hence the fact that I am a huge supporter of your company.

Just thought I would let you know what matters to me. My words are my words alone, and do not speak for everyone, and that is not my intention. I just thought, since we have established a relationship on you producing clothes that I love and me supporting your product, you would like to hear my latest confession.

Warmest regards,

Trinity

Disclaimer: These are not my photos. All rights belong to Victoria Secret, an amazing clothing company.

I Danced with God Today ...

Today was like any other day for me, normal, with nothing exciting lurking in the shadows. I woke up with this immense sadness on my chest. I discussed this prior that perhaps being sad has become habitual to the point that I just am that way without intentionally meaning to be, it just is so.

Anyway, I went to yoga (amazing, but for another blog) and I followed by having a great time in the step class (a really good friend joined me, will be in another blog). Interestingly enough, while I was in a relaxation pose towards the end of yoga, I closed my eyes and tried to become one with myself. I tried to get into my own head and answer the question of why I have allowed something so pessimistic and foreign to is shape, change, and alter a new me, without intentionally meaning to.

I closed my eyes, and as I laid on the floor, trying to find the rhythm of my heart and the sound of my inner voice, God asked me to dance. A gentle hand reached for mine and we began, just like that. It may sound silly or funny or ridiculous even, but he did. As a dancer who has yet practiced her art in quite sometime, I didn't miss a beat in my dream really; if I did, it didn't matter. God twirled me around and made me smile, he lifted me up in the air, and we moved as one unit. As I tripped or stumbled, he caught my arm or leg and twisted me away from my misshap, and we kept the dancing going. I moved and became the best dancer I had every been in this moment, and I was so happy. I danced with God. It was beautiful. I thought about the energy that I was putting off in the world, recognizing we all are apart of our circumstances. I realized that I was missing the bigger picture, and I realized that I wanted to use my energy and my life to change the world, my world. As I sat up, keeping my eyes closed, the instructor stated something along the lines that we are a constant energy that should be used for good. Her words resonnated with my dance, my dance with God. I smiled and kept smilling.

When I left the class and I went to buy my lunch, I looked on the wall and saw something amazing. I saw a statement that said this: If you want to predict the future, start by creating your life.

I realized then that through coincidences, I was having an ongoing conversation with God. It was as though he was whispering in my ear as we danced our sweet, amazing dance. We hold the change that our heart craves and desires. I realized that I will have to commit every day to a better me, and that saying I will today, doesn't necessarily flow into tomorrow. It's like forgiving, where you have to make a conscious effort to forgive every day. I will make that effort, and yes, I got this all from one dance. I danced with God today, and I realized he was something else to me, my ballroom dance partner. Together we will become champions, in this life and perhaps the next.

What a beautiful dance it was.

A Poem: Reoccurring Dream

I live in my reoccurring dream that he is possible
That the trace of his finger tips will not be left to my imagination
I close my eyes and I can hear his whispers … my heart is awaken
His voice is … pure … seductive… soulful … addictive like sex
And I want it over and over again

His eyes are so piercing that my soul becomes shy
And his features are so memorizing
I can stare for hours and not get bored
I’m so in love … if love can even describe what I feel

Take my breath away … he can have every gasp
I’ll live breathless if I can just be in his presence
I don’t need air if I can smell his natural scent … at least once
His arms seem so strong and yet so invitingly alluring
Cozy is the correct ellipsis
I can see the paralysis taken affect for days at a time …

What would it be like to be the center of his attention?
Or for our fingers to find peace by coupling our hands together
I wonder about his taste … If only my lips could make it to his
I want to know his talents and imperfections
So that I can learn to appreciate them both
I want to be the relaxation his heart craves …
A sigh of relief he desperately yearns for
Most of all … I want to be his reoccurring dream …
As he is mine …

By: Trinity R. Salazar

This poem I wrote for a character in my novel.  It's a really interesting and important piece of the book, this feeling here because it describes the beginning of a love relationship.  I thought I would share with you all; normally I only post my work on starlite, but I figured why not share with you all.  I hope you enjoy!

My Booty and the Blues ...

Okay, I promise to stop starting my blog names off with the word Booty ... but I kind of like it, which I do know may be weird for some people.  Nonetheless, this post is about me whipping my booty into shape and the fact that I have the blues. 

I don't know what is wrong with me that sometimes I get up in the morning, and I instantly feel sad.  I tell myself that I am sad, and to be honest, there is nothing going on really that should make me feel so completely sad.  Where has my hope gone?  I feel like it has been replaced with this latent lurking lament feeling.  Can feeling sad become habitual?  The reason I ask that question is because I was once sad for a while, and it was an every day feeling.  I have always been the optimistic type and I themed my life off of words like hope, faith, and happiness.  But now, for some odd reason, it is kind of hard to find that pep again.  I hate this feeling, and I want to go back to the old one.

Anyway, this week I am going to complete an entire week of doing something physical.  On my off days I am still going to walk with my dogs, and stretch lightly, perhaps even take up chanting.  Maybe that will help with some of my blues. I have been writing more of my fiction novel, and I have some great ideas.  I wish I knew of some creative writing classes I could take online that would help me out, as of right now I'm kind of clueless with who is legit and who is not.  Sorry to switch subjects in the middle of writing about my workout, but this blog in its entirety will be about my life, feelings, and random thoughts that pop into my head.

Okay, so below I am going to outline my intentions for the week:

Monday March 7: Yoga, followed by Step Aerobics, and maybe a one mile run; and a walk with the dogs for a light stretch in the evening

Tuesday: Pilates and a 4-5 mile run (I really want to do a 5 mile, but I haven't done it in a while, so I say 4 to be safe).

Wednesday: Yoga followed by Step, and maybe a one mile run afterwards; and a walk in the evening to stretch

Thursday: Pilates and Spinning and maybe a 15 minute workout on the elliptical or walk on an incline on the treadmill or track for 15 minutes

Friday: Yoga and Zumba for sure!! Last Friday was awesome!

Saturday: Run outside four miles

Sunday: Step and Yoga

This is my plan this week, if it deviates I will let you know!!

Something positive that I am going to remind myself that with each moment that we live, our thoughts and our actions are what defines us as people.  I will be positive and stay up beat, because I am in control of my own happiness; no one can give that to me but instead just provide it as an extra.  I am going to make a conscious effort to love every bit of life, good and bad.  I am going to be happy habitually :o)~

I want these bathing suits and I want to look like this in it. So ..............

LET'S GET OUR GROOVE ON THIS WEEK AND OUR BOOTIES IN BOOTY SHAKING SHAPE!!!!

Booty Camp ... Say What?

So, March Madness has already proven to be rigged with insane instructors, really looking to whoop my hinny into shape. My legs feel foreign, I have a numbness in my butt that just won't go away, and my arms are screaming for some sort of upper body strength so that they never have to struggle in a plank again :o)

This week, as I stated I was going to work out and update you all on my progress. So, I did my spin class, which by the way was awesome.  Everyone is so productive, and I often wondered as we travelled down our invisible paths together, were they really turning up the resistance knob, or were they pretending?  You know, faking the funk by glidding their hands around the resistance knob, signaling that they turned it up.  You can kind of tell who is really putting on the resistance and who pretends, because their peddles instantly get harder to push and it slows down.  Unless you're a beast like me and resistance can't stop you, no one can!!! Totally and completely kidding. 

So, the next day I thought I would do a nice cool down with a Boot Camp class.  I figured it would be cardio, but almost like a kickboxing class that I can handle, right? WRONG! I walk in and I see that everyone is getting weights, and I'm thinking no big deal, probably something to do with minor resistance or arm defining exercises, right? WRONG AGAIN! This class was full of lunges, burpees, planks, push ups, squats coming out of squats to only end in a squat, and football running. You know, where the football player is in a semi squat running in place, so like a squat run if you will.  Anyway, you get the picture.  Boot camp instantly changed in my mind to BOOTY CAMP! It was ridiculous. 

However, and this is a minor however, I did not want to feel so defeated, so I did something silly.  I decided after Booty Camp I would hit the treadmill, because one little class wasn't going to defeat me, and I still had energy, right? Wrong, well kind of wrong.  I only managed to run a mile, and walk a mile on an incline.  When I stepped off the treadmill, I just knew my legs were going to cave in like a house of cards in front of like 30 people. Somehow, I managed to walk out with my dignity barely in tact.

The next day, I was thinking that I would do a nice cool down yoga, right? Wrong! This yoga class, taught by the cutest sweetest little Asian lady, was once again full of planks, PLANKS, and more PLANKS, and lunges! She wasn't as sweet as she looks, hence the notion that looks can be deceiving.  I just wanted to stretch and breathe, and that was all.  I didn't understand how I was in another predicament where my legs may just fall off of my body. Yoga smoga, it was unlike any yoga I had done before. Anyway, I will be doing it again, but perhaps not after completing a booty camp class the day prior. 

Again, not wanting to feel defeated I participated in a Zumba class.  Now, I was hesitant at first, because to be honest, the Zumba classes I had previously taken were kind of silly. But I am glad I stayed.  It was a lot of fun, but it was a lot of work.  My teacher was this little fire cracker, bouncing off the walls, giving little direction and only signaling us to follow her lead.  The booty shaking was insane. My instructor split us up into two groups for us to have a booty shaking battle, it was funny and awkard all in the same.  There were a lot of booties in the air, and no guys around to loose their minds lol.  I just knew after a week of this my hinny would have redefined itself, and I can feel it transforming now (not really, but in due time im sure).  My instructor had so much energy, and I was so envious!! I wanted to keep bouncing and jumping around like her, but it wasn't happening. Maybe it's because of my new old age (26, turning 27, trying to grasp the concept that I'm not getting any younger) that my energy has suddenly declined.  Doesn't working out amplify your energy. After I'm done with spin, and it only happens when I do a spin class that I feel like taking a nap, right there on the bike.  I don't know why I feel so sleepy!

So anyway, while I was working out this week and thinking hard about March Madness and this accountability factor thing, I started thinking of ways to make sure that I will stay committed.  I was reading in a fitness magazine about a fitness contest that ends in April.  I am going to enter into the contest and use this contest as motivation.  It should be interesting and fun.  So far, I am exhausted, I'm sore, and for some reason I am so ready for more.  Hehe, that's like a little theme song! I'm exhausted, I'm sore, and I'm ready for MORE! Okay, enough of being a complete dork!

I have realized that I have a problem, a huge problem with sweets.  It is so hard to give up.  I don't drink soda, I eat pretty healthy, I don't eat fast food, but I love everything candy. I think the only way I am going to be successful is by putting my sweets on a diet themselves.  Therefore, only two days out of the week starting next week will I allow myself to eat a few sweets.  They will be on the days that I do heavy cardio, therefore, I can work off any extra calories I obtain from the sweets :o).

Overall, I think this month has gotten off to a pretty decent start.  For those of you that are starting to run, I am going to say the most cliche but truest thing about conquering it, it really is mental.  I use to hate running because I was terrible at it.  I mean I was decent in high school, but when I got out of high school, it wasn't fun anymore.  I started to look at my time and how I couldn't pass a mile without stopping.   But now, I can run like the wind.  When you are running, you should find a nice speed that you feel comfortable at.  Breathe through the terrible moments that you feel like you're going to die, because believe it or not (though in the moment it is hard to believe) it is fleeting, and it will be over soon.  You will reach your next peak, and you will get to your next mile or mark with no problem.  Make sure you have eaten something prior or at least had a decent amount of water so that you are hydrated.  Stretch well and put on some good tunes so that you don't get bored.  A lot of times when I want to stop running, it is only because I am bored and there isn't anything around keeping my attention.  Lastly, here is an exercise that my old trainer gave me to help increase my running abilities. 

In intervals complete this exercise: Run for 2 minutes at a consistent speed without stopping, then run on a sprint (your pace sprint) for 1 minute, and then walk for 2 minutes.  Repeat this until you reach a mile. 

I use to do this over and over, and it really helped me reach my mile goals. Now, I can run 3 miles without thinking twice, and five miles without feeling like I am really going to die.  Sooner or later, I am hoping to be able to run 8 miles or 10 miles without it being such a big deal.  After all, we are just people without any true reason of wanting to run except for getting in shape.  It isn't for a job or anything like that so enjoy it and take your time creating your groove.  Enjoy your weight loss, because it is exciting to see your hard work manifest itself.  Good luck, and I will see you in the beginning of next week with my workout plans! I look forward to hearing your stories and plans as well, so please keep me updated!! Good Luck!!